Wednesday 27 March 2013

Filthy Books = Funny Looks



Okay, I'm going to be honest with you guys, I read romance novels.

When I was growing up, I always thought romance novels were something really gross that lonely old women read because nobody wanted to makeout with them. My earliest memory of of such a book was when I was sitting on a bus with my girl guide group. It was a long drive to wherever we were headed, so all of us kids were occupied singing songs or picking our noses, but I remember looking up and seeing the parent supervisor reading a novel. She had a really strange look on her face and she was getting pretty sweaty. Some of the older girls explained to me that she was getting sweaty because she was getting turned on by her boner book. Whatever that meant.

About a year ago, my sister lent me a book and told me it was about vampires. I was three chapters in when I learned that these vampires weren't just sucking blood (IF ya know what I mean).

I was intrigued. I went to Chapter's to pick up the next book in the series, but I was mortified to carry it around the store. I felt like everyone was watching me and just KNEW that I had a dirty book in my hands. I did everything to cover it up, and when I got up to the cash, the cashier all but died laughing at what I was buying. At first I felt a little bit embarrassed, but then I quickly realized that there's nothing wrong with it! Am I a sweaty woman reading romance novels on a bus filled with children? No. Am I old and lonely? No. In fact, even if I was, there would be nothing to be ashamed of anyway! I quickly ran back to the shelf, grabbed another dirty book, and proudly made my purchase with my head held high and my books out in the open! I didn't even take a bag!

It's fun to read stuff that makes you laugh, shocks you, or even provokes you! It's also important to know that you should never be embarrassed by something you do. Be proud and open! Some people might not like it, but those who accept it will love you with their whole hearts!

Besides, boners are hilarious.

Hugs and poops,

Nichole Woodman

6 comments:

  1. This is awesome! I remember in high school, I checked out a book from the public library that was pretty steamy. It had vampires and werewolves in it. I knew what it was when I got it, but it didn't stop me from reading it during down time in class. Well, I did remove the paper cover so all you could see was the black binding. I figured it would probably be taken up if a teacher knew what I was reading haha!

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    1. haha
      Best story ever! Do you remember the name of the book?

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    2. I believe it was called Full Moon Rising. VERY steamy haha!

      http://www.amazon.com/Full-Rising-Riley-Jensen-Guardian/dp/0553588451/ref=sr_1_110?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1364504208&sr=1-110&keywords=moon

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    3. I'm totally going to get it. ba ha ha

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  2. I think romance novels are the only ones I don't really read. I have one sitting at my desk at work and it's been here for months and I just can't seem to start it. But, in those months I've read like 4 other crime novels lol

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    1. I love crime novels too! Do you watch crime television shows? I'm addicted to Criminal Minds!

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