Awkward People Unite

New Girl character Jess is me in a Zooey Deschanel Costume.

Awkward is cool! Yes! I've been waiting for this day since I was snipped out of my mom's belly and plopped in an incubator. I've actually always been a really awkward person, seriously, from day one of my life on this earth. My mom was only eight months pregnant with me when the doctors sent her in for a c-section. They had confused her due dates, so instead of realising that I still had a month left to cook, they thought mom was a month overdue and they got yoinked me out. Of course the sight my shriveled, eensy, yellow body quickly snapped them into reality. I spent the first chunk of my life in an incubator, facing a viewing window, ass end up with my doo-doo on display because I was too tiny for diapers. Sadly, the story doesn't get less awkward from here.

Does anyone else watch New Girl? It comes on Tuesday nights. It's about a girl who ends up living with three guys and awkwardess ensues...lots of awkwardness. When I first started watching this show I got a weird cold feeling all through my body. It was super eerie just how much this character reminded me of myself (well, a super adorable, cooler version, but the similarities are uncanny)! I now see what other people have seen when they meet me. Oh dear God. But guess what!? It's one of the most popular shows on television right now! For serious! So, when do I get crowned coolest person of all? I hope the crown is a clip on because otherwise I'll trip and break it within minutes.

To be honest, as many times as I've ended up in odd situations, or embarrassed myself and other people by saying/doing/falling on/eating or breaking something, I wouldn't change whatever part of me causes these reactions. Everytime I ;dance in the grocery store and slip on the coffee beans; say the word penis in a quiet room; end up flashing my butt to onlookers while trying to fix my tights; make an inappropriate comment about Boyfriend in front of his friends; or blurt out my inner thoughts to someone I just met, it's who I am. I think that if everyone would be honest with themselves and others, there'd be a lot less fighting in this world, and maybe even less breakups. Don't hold in your gasses (real or metaphorical), let everything out! The people you'll get along with will laugh, the people who don't laugh aren't worth the gas you just expelled. That's my advice for life. Embrace your awkwardness and find others like you. One of us, one of us, gooble gobble gooble gobble (please tell me someone else knows this movie reference).

Anyway, that's my little love yourself rant for today.
Hope everyone is just peachy :)

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." - De. Seuss

Hugs and poops,

Nichole