Struggles With Weight - Past And Present

Me in 2004 - 137 lbs

In 2004, my boyfriend of three and a half years broke up with me and I got really sad. Apparently sad Nikki is all about the chocolate and cheese, because I went from 120 lbs to 137 in only a few months. Break my heart and I break the scales!

Me in 2006 - 115 lbs

 In my second year of university I lost a lot of weight really quickly, and very unhealthily. I stopped eating and ran myself ragged with school and extracurricular activities. I absolutely hated how I looked and thought I was fatter than a blimp. Looking back at pictures of me then, I've come to realize that weight isn't some magical number that can remedy how you feel about yourself.

Me in 2013 - 140 lbs

Over the past couple of years my diet has been comprised mostly of take-out food and sweets. It's not hard to pack on the pounds when you live that way. At twenty-seven years old, I'm am now the heaviest that I have ever been.

My plan is to replace some of the crappy foods I love so much with things that actually have nutritional value to them, and snack on fruits and veggies instead of junk foods. I've been doing reall well over the past couple of weeks, but I won't lie, it's been hard. It's so much easier to pick up a fast food dinner on the way home from work than it is to go home and cook something up. Also, I'd much rather eat a take-out burger than a salad, so I have to work on my palate.

The eliptical machine has been very motivating, as it sits and judges me harshly whenever I sit down in the living room. I haven't been using it as much as I'd like to, but I want to do this slowly and built up my resistance.

I'm being a good little girl and losing weight the healthy way.

What's different about my mind set is that I'm not worried about the number on the scale so much as I am focused on how I feel. If I'm 140 lbs and I have the energy that I need to do the things I love, I'll be happy with that!

So, that's my update on the healthy living adventure so far!

If you're interested in a healthy alternative to junky snacks, check out my post on how to make your own popcorn instead of buying the pre-packaged stuff!

(Hannah, we're totally in this together, right!? ha ha)

Hugs and poops,

Nichole

Feeling Flat And Being Fat = Different

Starting today I'm officially on a take-out food strike. No fast food for me for a long while! I'm also going to change my snacking habits, and try to eat more fruits and veggies. I'm also going to start getting out more. I have a habit of heading for the couch as soon as I get home from work, but now I'm going to try my hardest to do almost anything besides lie down when I get home.

Why am I doing this?

Lately I've been feeling really down; I have no energy, I don't feel pretty and I've been down in the dumps. I used to think that losing weight was a miracle cure that would make me feel beautiful and healthy, but I realize now that there's a lot more to it than that.

I'm 5'2" and I weigh 141 pounds as of last night.

I'm not comfortable when I sit down, I feel too heavy when I walk, and I can't run around like I used to. I'm going to change this right now, and every Wednesday I'm going to do a little health update. I think this might motivate me to stick to it and be good to myself.

Just to be clear, I think that feeling down about yourself and being fat are things that should have nothing to do with eachother. Every shape is beautiful and it's sad if you use size to look down on people or yourself. My adventure in healthy living is not to achieve a certain number on the scale or fit into any little black dresses.

Wish me luck and send me positive vibes! Also, if anyone wants to do this with me, just send me an email and maybe we can turn this into something more fun!

Hugs and poops,

Nichole