An Afternoon Drive Through The Fiery Gates

Have you ever woken up and thought "Hmm, something tells me I should close my eyes and pretend this never happened"? I have. It happened a few mornings ago actually, when I was waking up at six a.m to start the drive back home. Why didn't I blog about this earlier? Well friends, it's called shock, and it takes time to recover from it. Also, it's pretty difficult to type when your eyes are twitching.

See the darling photo of Harvey above? It's a lie. This is not what he looked like that day. He only has one eye, but when it wasn't filled with disdain for putting him in a moving vehicle, it was filled with a fiery and urgent look of complete insanity. As I drove away from the peace and safety of my mom's house (with Oz and Harvey in the back seat), I already had a sweaty brow and an understanding of why people smoke cigarettes.

Let me explain something. Boyfriend's home town is about fifteen minutes away from mine (in car). It took me thrity-five minutes to get there.

I first had to stop two minutes after leaving the house because Harvey had crawled up onto my head - I was having a hard time seeing cleary with  my scalp being slowly removed. The second stop was about ten minutes after that, when Harvey started yowling (usually a sure sign that a brown crime is about to occur). The third and final stop before finally picking up Boyfriend was five minutes later, when Harvey managed to remove him harness and jump onto the dashboard (in front of my eyeballs).

I pulled into Pasadena as a much older woman, having aged at least twenty years on my short drive. I don't drink, but if someone had offered me something when I arrived, I might have taken it.

Apparently the only way that Harvey can travel is in my arms. For the next seven hours, I sat (pretzel legged) with Harvey nestled into my chest and belly. I would have been mad if he hadn't been so clearly scared, and now so relieved to be safe in my arms. Good thing he's a momma's boy. Looking back it feels nice to know that he's so comfortable with me that he can put aside his fear as long as I hold him, but at the time all I wanted was to cry while singing some Celine Dion. Mental break, perhaps?

That's not a smile on my face... it's crazy, taking form as a curled lip.

Hope everyone else had a lovely traveling experience over the holidays!

Hugs and poops,

Nichole

The Night of the Franken-Cake

It's December, not October, but I've created monsters.

I wanted so badly to share a different recipe with you guys today, but it just wouldn't turn out! I tried three different time before I decided that I was driving myself crazy. To make up for this parade-pooping malfunction, I decided to share my favorite icing recipe... but apparently the theme of sanity testing is going to continue all through December. I don't know what it is about me making cupcakes that always invites gremlins (first story here), but here's another cupcake comedy hour for you, on behalf of me.

I decided to quickly whip up a batch of cupcakes using store bought mix (to save time, since I just wanted to share the icing recipe, and also because I had it in my cupboard.). Of course the mix was slightly expired, but I didn't care, I wanted cupcakes and I wanted them right now. As I was about to pour the mix into the cups, I discovered that Monsieur Cat has decided to eat two of my silicone baking cups. Fantabulous! Like any good baking soldier, I pushed onwards and thought "whatever, I'll just spread out the extra batter amongst the ten remaining cups"... here's what happens when you do that:



Whatever... the icing will cover the bulbous tops of my Franken-cakes, right? Moving along!



Now, to make the icing!

You need:

- 1/4 cup of softened cream cheese - 1/4 cup of softened butter - 1/2 tsp vanilla - 1 1/2 cups of icing sugar

Blend the SOFTENED cream cheese and butter together with a blender until it's all mushed together. DON'T try and skip the softening step... I flung a chunk of butter across my kitchen with the blender, learn from my impatience, kids. Add your vanilla, and slowly mix in your icing sugar. I just kept adding icing sugar until it tasted so sweet that the mishaps of the day just melted away into tooth cavities. You need to add it slowly though, or it will poof up in your face like a delicious bomb explosion. I did this. Your eyes can't taste the sugar, it's a waste.

When all mixed together you get a delicious icing for your hideous cupcakes! This icing is soooo good (if you like cream cheese)! My favorite pairing is this icing on top of chocolate cupcakes.

I hope you enjoy this recipe, and if you end up with ugly cupcakes, don't fret, mine still tasted delicious!

Hugs and poops,

Nichole

Random Funny

I have no idea where this picture originated, all I have is the above link. All rights reserved to the original owner (let me know if you're aware of who that is).

This kills me! I laughed so hard at this that I just had to share it.

Happy Tuesday!

Hugs and poops,

Nichole